“Recharged…”


Last post was such a party killer, 🙂 but it had to be written. I wanna thank you people for your support. To keep it short… I’ve talked with my friend, and she forgave me, at least I hope so. I’m so happy that I’m done with that.

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The title of this blog post is “recharge” for a reason. I’m so exhausted because this week have been everything from hell and back, and also I’ve been sick. It will be so good to have this weekend, and also being fully relaxed.

I’ve had a good day so far, and after talking to my friend it made it better. I’m gonna relax for another hour before I’m going to the gym to spend some more energy, before jumping into bed 🙂

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I hope the rest of you have had a better week then me. What are your plans for this weekend?

~Sindre E

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“When Everything Turns to Ashes”


I actually started believing that life wasn’t a huge nightmare. I actually believed everything would be better. That the better came, came to stay. I quickly realize that life never would be peaceful. That trust is a treasure you should hide deep within and forget that it’s even there. In a matter of seconds, what you once had is so lost in time, that’s when you understand that things burn… Only leaving regrets and ashes.

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When I was left destroyed for the first time, I simply thought “Okay!” he’s a piece of s***! I got over it, but I never ever believed I’d ever be happy. Then at my worst states of being bullied I thought “I just should pretend to be happy, so nobody feel like they’re controlling me!” I knew that I wouldn’t ever have any real friends, I probably would turn to suicide! I got over it, met some new friends. All that pain and sorrow still lingering beneath my skin. The fire that burns from the insides and out.

For the first time in my life I was getting more and more happiness. More luck! I did begin summoning who I was, who I was meant to be. I got over the worst of bullying, people started respecting me somewhat. I worked my f****** ass of to get into the course I was meant to follow! The day I got into the school, and course of my dreams, I believed… “This is my good chance to be happy, meet people that doesn’t know me at all!” It was scary starting school. I met many wonderful people, they truly is the best people in the world!

Image I had met people like me, new cool people, people I still today adore to earth. I was a part of something, had nice people… with no intentions on hurting me. I was happy, and it was only going upwards. There was this day where I thought to myself that this is to good to be true! I were only waiting for something to go wrong… A little time went by. School was a nightmare, a living hell to start with… but I had helpful people who supported me. Who actually for once truly believed on me, gave me hope.

Then what I had been waiting on started. There was this mistake on a party right before Christmas. I had my friends with me through it, and everything went perfectly fine. Maybe not so much to the other half of that end, but that’s that persons own fault. The beautiful happiness came back, no worries we’re left.

I now felt the horrible feeling of hope, that just ended once more. A friend of mine ended her relationship with her boyfriend on horrible terms. He was more then heart broken. I didn’t know him that well, but he turned to me… and I told him that he could talk to me about everything… so that maybe his pain could pass away. When I met him on Monday I had to give him a hug saying everything will be fine in the end… he broke down I felt his sorrow. That day I talked with him letting him speak, get his feelings out. I felt that he needed that support.

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My friend arrived at school later that day, and saw me and another friend talking with him, because he wanted to talk. That was taken wrong. She believes that we support him over her, breaking our loyalty towards her. Personally have I let so many details out of this, because that’s things I don’t share because I feel like I’m still her friend though she hates me. How is it possible to turn straight from best friends to total strangers. How is it possible to not give me or my other friend a chance to tell her the truth. We’ve tried our best to two days straight! We’ve truly not done anything wrong besides comforting her boyfriend who barley can keep it together.

Now I and the other friend are sad and mad at the same time. I have no idea to what, how, where I can go or be sociable. I …I’m empty and confused. I just wanna… I’m empty of everything called words…

I hope that I’m excused from correcting my writing… I can’t read through this… it’s too weird…

~Sindre E

I’ve always known what I wanted to be, but not how that’ll be!


I can start of by saying that I hate telling people what I wanna be. It’s because I’m so afraid of disappointing people, and maybe mostly afraid of disappointing myself. I’ve actually known all my life what I wanted to do, but not quite in detail… if you know what I mean? I’ve known that It’d have something to do in the entertainment business. I wanna be an actor

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I’ve had this ambition for a really long time, and people say that dreaming is healthy, but not always. For me it’s scary… terrifying in all ways, but still comforting. It’s what I wanna do, I’m inspired of people and personalities. I love digging deep and being someone else. Acting is my way of doing that… It’s my way of taking a break from reality. Feeling a characters pain is lovely, and when I’m assigned a role… I am that role until the role is closed and I’m done.  It’s weird being around me when I’m working, because I automatically become my character and do what my character would’ve done. (enough of that; I might make a post of funny incidents happening when I’m in role)

They say that if your dreams doesn’t scare you, they aren’t big enough”

I’m planning on moving to LA when I turn eighteen or nineteen. Don’t start judging me already… because I feel like that’s what I’m supposed to do. I don’t think that I’m better than anyone, or have a better chance than anyone. I’m only saying that it’s the right thing for me to do. I don’t know why, but my instincts tell me that. It’s what I have ahead of me. Of course I dream of making it in Hollywood, who doesn’t? I’m terrified to get my hopes up, and I believe that’s both important and good. People often tell me that I’m special and unusual compared to many others, but personally I don’t quite believe so though I feel different in many ways. 

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Me as many others deal with insecurity, but of course it get’s better. I’m dealing with it as many others, but still it’s there. Am I pretty enough? Am I talented enough? Am I hot enough? Do people like me? Will I ever find my true love? These are some of the things I deal with. I personally don’t thing I own any beauty at all, but I still know I’m not pure ugliness either. I wanna feel admired like some of the other boys. I often think that since I’m not good or hot/pretty enough I’ll never make it serious within acting. Still I don’t want to give up on this dream. I know that this is what I wanna do… I seriously wanna be an actor...

ImageThe biggest reason that my dreams scares me is all the things that comes in between. Like how will I get an apartment there? How will I survive, get a job and money for rent? Will I ever find the courage to make it my all on auditions? Will I ever be casted? Will I ever find a talent managerIt’s all the pieces that’s needed for it to be fulfilled. I believe that I’ll make a living there somehow, but it’s too unpredictable to think that I can survive being an actor. 

Still I believe that dreams can come true no matter how hard it will be. As long as you work your hardest towards your goals, there’ll always be a light on the other end of the tunnel. I believe that I’ll make a living in LA, if not as an actor, it might be something else. I believe that this is the right path for me, and I promise I will work my fucking ass off to make as much as possible my reality! 😀

I wont call myself an actor before I’m there… I’ll always be an aspiring actor, and I’ll still keep my dream a little secret until I can prove that I’ve made it. I know the chances, and they also scare me, but I choose to not think about it, and just staying positive no matter what. 

What’s your dream, your plans and hopeful future? 

~Sindre 

Busy Life, Busy Week!


This week has been a tiny break from the blog, but not my life. There’s been a lot at school with five tests, and they all went really good I suppose. I’ve also tried working out as much as I could. I went to the gym on Monday and whole four hours on Thursday, and I’m proud of that accomplishment.

69_largeOn tuesday I went to a small info meeting with EF, which was really fun and informational. I got more information regarding my choice of studies and I still feel that it’s the right studies for me. Today it’s actually 140 days away until I leave for Los Angeles. I will later write a post about the things that I hope to get to do while I’m in LA.

I also got to experience the best neck-head-back-arms massage in my life. I got to talk to such an inspiring person that made me realize a couple of really great things. Things like dreams, future and growing up.

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This weekend have been mostly about just relaxing, because this is the first weekend in a long time I haven’t been booked. It’s really great, but I feel really tired all the time and yawn a lot. 🙂 Today I went to town to meet a friend I haven’t spent much time with. We went to a café just to relax and talk. It was fun being with her for a couple of hours. She’s such an  interesting person. She’s actually a writer, and I’m excited to read one of her books in the future. 😉

Tomorrow I’m planning a ski trip with my grandparents. It’s such a long time since I went skiing, and I think It’ll be good with some exercise on a sunday instead of just being lazy.

Hope you’ve had a nice weekend. Tell me a little bit about it! 🙂 <(“)

~ Sindre 

You Haven’t Lost Me!


Sorry sweeties, but I haven’t forgot you and I never would! I’ve been having a lot to do this week, and now I’m mostly ready for bed! I can’t wait for it to be weekend, because then I’ll have the time to breath and relax! ❤

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Today have been a mostly good day. It started out with a movie in English class, and then followed with Spanish, and a math test that went really well. 🙂 Singing class was okay, but had it’s flaws. After school I was really exhausted and thought about not going to the gym, but I went and I’m really happy that I did 😀

I went with my best friend Thea and we first did 45 minutes of Kettle Bells, and holy cow how hard that was! We afterwards did some weight lifting and then went for our second “class”, Body Balance. It felt so good, but it was painful given in mind that we had a hard exercise of KBs 😉

That’s mostly what I’ve been doing today. 🙂 Tomorrow (friday) I will write a week summary and follow on with some posts that’s behind schedule!

Hope you’ve had a great day, tell me about it! 😉

Sleep Tight! 🙂 Talk to you sweet ones tomorrow!